November Date: Afternoon Delight (Food! Not ____ ) and the Orange Parable

 Hello readers! (all two of you...  Hi Mom!)  Guys, I haven't completely failed and left my sweet husband in the dust.  I know I haven't been posting like I said I would,  but finding time for a creative date every month is a lot harder than I thought!  I have two other dates that happened before this which will come soon.  Devin is out of town, so maybe I can get more things done.  A parable came to mind.  I think I will call it the  

parable of the orange: 

 A couple is sitting at opposite ends of a table.  In the middle of the table is an absolutely perfect and beautiful orange.  You can smell the citrus emanate through the air.  Both people know it's going to be delicious.  Both people know it is not only sweet with a little bit of tang, but also incredibly healthy.  So why is the couple just sitting there and staring at it?  I picture the man leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed, thinking about how good oranges taste.  The woman is leaning on the table, staring at the orange too.  I wont tell you her thoughts because she is a woman and the post would never end and it would be waaaay to negative a vibe for this blog's mojo. 

They both sigh.  

I use an orange, because an orange takes work to get open.  SOMEONE has to swallow their pride, grab the freaking thing and peel it for both to enjoy.  So who's going to be the one to do it!?  I say it's YOU!!!!  Be the instigator and stop waiting around for some magical thing. Oranges take work.  Sometimes they are messy, but a good orange is freaking delicious and oh soooooo good for you.  They help you fight off sickness too, just like dating your spouse helps you fight off all of the terrible things that are against happy and healthy marriages!

back to the date and crappy blogging:

 Here's the thing, I would sit down to start on my post, but then I would feel bad because Devin would be all alone on the couch watching Doctor Who without me.  How could I sit on my computer when souffle girl was calling to us!?  Anways, I saw an ad for #eatdowntownprovo last week and knew I had to jump at the chance to take Devin there!  I'm so glad I bought my ticket in advance as well.  It made it so I couldn't back out, and on the day of the event it  sold out in 5 minutes!!

This date was awesome for so many reasons:

1) Food...:  Did you know Provo is becoming the new restaurant mecca?  It's amazing what they have done down there and I can only imagine what tourist traffic the new Provo temple will bring. 

2) The afternoon:  I think this is my new favorite time to go on a date!  It's way easier to find a sitter (Thanks Emily and Mara) because they don't have to stay out late and can still hang out with friends that night.  I'm also way more alert and am not ready to go home and go to sleep!  It was really fun!

3)Friends: The awesome thing about Social media is that it can bring friends along that you haven't seen or heard from in years!  So glad Jacob could be our photographer!!! 

The date:

They gave us a little ticket with all of the restaurants listed.   We got to walk around downtown Provo to all the yummy places and eat all the things for only $15! (That's per couple, not per person!) Restauraunts included: 

* Los Hermanos
* Gurus
* Gloria's Little Italy
* Communal
* Taste
* Ivie Juice Bar
* Station 22
* Bruges
* Sammy's
* Slate

* Sensuous Sandwich

Gurus served us a huge serving of their chicken quesadilla. We love Gurus.  Go there.  Don't question it.  Just do it.

Next was Gloria's Little Italy.  This is one of our most favorite local Italian restaurants.  Their alfredo sauce is out of this world.  We are also a big fan of their amatriciana  sauce.  After you eat, you can go choose from a huge selection of desserts and gelato.   I decided to try something new and got their Cactus pear gelato.  We loved it!  Devin's cookies and cream flavor wasn't his favorite though. 

There is a new chocolate factory in town and they have opened a side store called Taste.  It isn't fully running yet, but this place will be an incredibly unique experience for those looking for a different kind of date night.   They had a fun demonstration on how to truly taste chocolate.  They gave us a sample and guided us through the process:

1) Break off a small piece and rub it between your fingers until it just begins to melt.

2) Put it on your tongue and let it melt there for a minute and then slowly spread it around your mouth with your tongue.

3)  Taste the different flavors infused in the chocolate.  Your mouth goes through an amazing journey of raspberry, cinnamon, and orange flavors all in one teeny piece of cocoa.  I felt like that little mouse in Ratatouille with fireworks exploding in his brain.  

4) Clear your palate with a tasting vinegar.  I've never even heard of these before!  We learned the hard way that you SHOULD NOT INHALE while drinking a sipping vinegar.  ha ha!  Mine was peach flavored and it was delicious.  

Cool Cool place.  I'm curious to see how it does when it is fully up and running.

 Shamy Photo bomb and a royal couch!

 Communal!    

We love Communal!  We know the chefs because my brother is involved with the business.  The sample they offered was a smoked trout pot pie.  Devin LOVED it.  It wasn't my favorite, but I have loved everything else I have had there.  If you haven't been here, Communal is an interested dining experience.  It is more of a taster's experience where you order several different items from the menu and you share them all together.  The items are not in bulk so don't go to have a super filling experience, but your taste buds will definitely leave fulfilled.   Our most favorite thing in the world are their caramelized  heirloom carrots.   The menu changes with what is in season, and they have a giant greenhouse that grows their own local fresh veggies all year long!  I have heard their hamburger on the lunch menu is the most amazing burger in the world.  I personally haven't tasted it, but I have heard testimonies that it is literally to die for.

 Station 22 and Bruges had a fun vibe to them.  

The Fries and dipping sauce at Bruges were delicious, but by the time we got there we were so full we could only eat a few bites!  Their waffles are supposed to be even better than Waffle Luv.  Lets be honest folks. You throw Nutella, strawberries and whipped cream on a piece of seaweed, and I will think it's the best thing in the world...  So who knows which waffle place waffles the best waffle....

Station 22 offered a homemade pumpkin donut hole.  The flavors were great but they were a bit greasy for us.  They also shared their own brewed rootbeer.  Devin considers himself a rootbeer snob, and it passed the test!  It was really good rootbeer.

Ivie....  Oh Ivie...   

This place will do well in a trendy college town like Provo.  It is just health smoothies.  I prefer to eat my salad with a fork and not through a straw, but if you like green smoothies and weed grass then this the place for you!  Just don't look too close at the menu...  you might order Spinch instead of spinich!  Ha ha!!

 

SLATE!!!   I didn't even know this place existed!!  If you are looking for a fancy place to eat in downtown Provo, go here!  Apparently there has been a fancy restaurant in the old Marriott since it was built forever ago!  The hotel just remodeled and this place is beautiful. They served us a Large deep fried shrimp covered in buffalo sauce sitting in blue cheese dressing.  Delicious would be an understatement.   

 

 Sammy's is always a favorite of ours with their pie slice shakes.  We didn't waste too much time in here because we are so familiar with it. :)

 Sensuous sandwich was fine.  We are Blimpie's and Pirate O's folk...  They did tell us a story about a guy who ate their 24 inch challenge in 1 minute and 30 seconds! I guess he turned it into a giant soggy soup sandwich with water and slurped it down.  It makes me gag just to think about it...

 We topped it off with a quick stroll to Sodalicious for some "extra dirty" drinks!  We couldnt' feel our hands by the end because it was sooooo cold, but such a fun date!   Thanx again for hanging with us Jake!!

Date #1: Spontaneous San Francisco Spook

You Guys!  Did any of you ever listen to Dr. Laura's radio show, or read any of her books on marriage, i.e.: Proper Care and Feeding of a Marriage/ Husband/Wife (lets be honest, same book, written three different ways)?  I've skimmed through my fair share of self help marriage books for classes in college and during some harder times and found her books to be the most enlightening for me.  Side note: I would also recommend The Bonds that Make us Free and Five Love Languages.

I digress.

The point I am slowly meandering to is that Dr. Laura always tried to teach that where much is given in a marriage, much is received.  This means in every factor of marriage: romance, intimacy , date nights, help with the kids, support, conversation, household chores, etc. etc.  Stop asking "How much more do I HAVE to give?" Change it to,"How much more CAN I give?"  I know every marriage is unique with different relationships and situations. As for me and my house, the second I changed my attitude about how I should treat my husband, the more I did/do for him, the more he did/does for me!  It works, folks!  

Case in point:  After my fancy date night #0, Devin upped the ante and surprised me two months later with his own date and took me to the opera in...

SAN FRANCISCO!

 

Who does that?!  No kids.  Just him and me (plus or minus some Ukrainians, a Russian, a Nepalian(?), Uber, and a lot of Chinese people) and the sourdough city for 4 days and 3 nights. How in the heck do I beat that?  There was one night where we didn't have big plans so I threw my creative date in there.  

The Date: San Francisco Ghost Hunt

Speaks for itself, right?  We've developed a new habit of going on ghost tours around old cities that we visit.  We had done one in Old Town San Diego and the other in Charleston, SC.  So naturally we were pros at this, right? Okay, maybe not, but San Francisco's Ghost Hunt was by far the best one we have done so far.  
I googled "san francisco ghost tours" and fell upon this fantastically hokey website:
San Fran Ghost Hunt     
 
$20 for 3 hours of ghost fun and a walking tour of Historical San Fran.  How could you turn down a tour like that?! After reading the reviews I knew it had to happen.   

Tip:  If you decide to do something like this, whether you believe in it or not, these tours are way more exciting if you play along and just have fun with it.  If you don't, then it will be a waste of your time and money.  

The Rundown:

In front of the infamously haunted Queen Anne HotelWe met our guide Jim Fassbinder, who was not unlike "Doc" Emmett Brown.

 
He was bedecked in period clothes from the 1800's to invite the spirits to be more open to communicate with us.  (Seriously, how could this not be anything but awesome!?) :)  The second he walked out, Devin and I knew we had chosen wisely.  The hotel appreciated the publicity and gave him reign to walk his groups through the most haunted areas of the hotel.  

Inside, we started in the dining area where Jim prepared us for possible ghost encounters, and what we needed to do to have said encounters occur.   He also gave his supernatural background, stating that he had ghost experiences since he was a child.  The hotel's interior was immaculate, gaudy, and totally out of a haunted horror film.  [Insert quotes from the Shining] There were about 15 of us.  

After his speech, we were quizzed.  If we answered his questions appropriately he would throw out points to his students.  "10,000 points to you, Sir," he would say.  Devin promptly responded, "And 300 points for Gryffindor!"  Everyone laughed. 

Now, Ghost Guide Jim developed this tour all by his lonesome and spouted off his script five nights a week, year-round.  Bless Devin's hilarious heart, he loved to throw out comments to make people laugh, and it threw Ghost Guide Jim off his game.  His script derailed a few times and took a few moments to find himself again.  Devin decided to bite his tongue or we would never get on with the tour. I think he nearly bit it off a more than a few times. 

That might be our only minor complaint about the tour.  All of the content and stories were great, but he had given the tour so many times that Ghost Guide Jim went into autopilot and spoke a little too quickly or mumbled a bit so we would miss some important details.  :( 

Still in the hotel, he took us to a room where Ghost Anne used to keep her office for an all girls school.  She was a nice ghost and tucked people in at night sometimes.  When taking pictures of children, sometimes balls of light are seen in the photos near the kids.  He gave us 15 minutes to roam the entire hotel, take pictures, feel for cold spots, and look for light orbs in our pictures.  It was actually a ton of fun!  Here are some of our photos.  Alas, we didn't see anything.  Another family in our group got a big orb next to their kids in a pic though!  Here are some of our pics.  Do you see anything?

That's a ghost detector that Ghost Guide Jim let us play with. 

 Jim kept making me wear his hat for pictures...  Who knows why.  I think he liked us.  Ha ha.

So no orbs or ghosts for us.  :(  Cool stories though! 

 After the hotel, he took us on a one mile walking tour of Historical San Francisco.  We stopped in front of a house where a women was brutally stabbed by her butler, under the orders of her angry sister.  

He pulled out an old skeleton key that is claimed to belong to the house.  It possesses poltergeist qualities where it still reenacts its last act in the house.  He held the key on his hand and we watched it turn itself slowly rolling uphill on his hand!!  He then asked for a volunteer, my hand shot up immediately.  I did the key thingy on my hand too, and it turned all by itself.  Magic trick or not, still really fun.  You can ask Devin for the video of it on his phone.  

He took us to a few more homes.  At one home, a husband's dead body arrived in a barrel of rum at the wife's home, chopped into bits.  Another ghost haunts the corner where her home once stood.  She was a billionaire voodoo lady who was an ex-slave.   She built her home with secret corridors so she could spy on the upperclass of San Fran and then blackmail them later. Her accountant ruined her, and she went crazy.  She still throws eucalyptus nuts at people if you talk ill of her.  :)

Anyways, the tour was great.  Ghost tours are a great way to learn a unique history of any city, and to have a little bit more kitschy fun along the way.  :) 

Thanks Ghost Guide Jim for a great night, it honestly was a highlight of our trip and we plan on doing a more local one soon!  If you are ever looking for something to do on a San Francisco night, Jim is your man.  

Date #0: The Marathon Date

We've only just begun.

It's called #0 because this date is the one that sparked the idea behind this project.  (Don't tell Devin I called him a project.  Ha ha!).  I got incredibly sick last spring which rendered me a bed-ridden weakling for nearly a month, then we had a friend from Germany visit us for over two weeks.  So between my pathetic Jaba-the-hut-like state and touring the state of Utah, the romantic side of our relationship had been set on the back burner for almost two months.  

I could tell he felt forgotten.

 Seeing my frustration, my best friend suggested this date idea for me.  She is my guru when it comes to taking care of one's husband. (Seriously puts me to shame) I struck a deal with her to do a babysitting trade and the date was on the schedule.  (Obvious date tip: Find friends that you feel comfortable doing a babysitting trade!  You save a ton of money and you may even get to stay out later than normal)

Keep in mind that this date was not a part of my challenge, it merely gave me the idea for it. Also, yes, there is a typical dinner-and-a-movie vibe to it but I promise the execution makes it really fun.  It wasn't cheap, but it was oh so worth it. 

The Marathon Date Plan:

1. Have the kids gone to the sitter's house before he gets home(I had ours gone over night). You save a lot by not renting a hotel and just staying at home with no children waking you up at ungodly hours. 

2. Kiss ;) at home when the sun is still shining with no kids in the house!!! It makes you feel much less like a vampire.   

3. Go to his choice of Restaraunt

4. Go to the hot tub at the rec center

5. Go to Swig.  

6. Go see Captain America.

7. Go back to our home with no children and pick them up in the morning!
  

The Response:

I took the kids to their overnight sitter and Devin got home from work before I did.  He was sitting on the couch when I got there and I sat on the couch next to him with a big goofy grin on my face. I was super excited for him.  We talked for a while.  I kept waiting for him to notice the wondrous silence of no munchkins.  After what seemed like forever he asked where the kidlets were.  

I told him I had planned a night totally and completely dedicated to him because he deserved it.  We could go wherever he wanted for dinner, etc. etc. etc.  The date was his oyster, so to speak...

His initial reaction was shock then pure joy.

He kept saying,"Is this really happening right now?! I Can't believe it!"

He chose Carrabba's for dinner where we shared a margarita pizza and chicken bryan with amatriciana pasta and laughed like giddy school girls. (Don't tell Devin I called him a girl).  Because it was all about him, the whole night seemed to have a different kind of electricity behind it.

I chose a rec center hot tub as spot #2 because he had been training for a marathon and needed to relax.  Going to a pool and hot tub without kids was like that same amazing feeling as...  Oh, I don't even know...  I guess it must be what heaven is like.  It was super relaxing and so fun to people watch and talk to each other without having to save our kids from drowning every 10 seconds.  

Walking to the car, he grabbed my hand and squeezed it with a huge grin.  "I still don't believe it," he said.  

After the movie we went to SWIG up in Lehi.  He told me "I didn't know how much I needed this, but I really needed this."  That made it all super worth it.  

Even the next day he mentioned that he was still riding on the afterglow of our date of epic-ness the night before.  :)

And thus a blog was born!

Date #1 will be happening shortly!

Happy Dating!

  

 

Never stop dating.

Never Stop Dating.

This is what I always write on those "advice" cards they pass around at bridal showers.  In most long term relationships it's easy to get lackadaisical.  We have formed bad habits of lazy dating.   The husband and I are actually pretty exciting people that love to go have adventures, we just have gotten boring and predictable in date-land.  We've turned into dinner-and-a-movie kind of people, which every now and then is great, but there are so many other great and unique things we could do on Date Night.  I feel too many women (including myself) expect the man to be responsible for all things in the dating department and then get disappointed when the poor guy doesn't fulfill some wild imaginary dream date.  Both parties become frustrated.  My husband is actually really awesome at taking care of me,  but I realize that's not very fair.  Why should he have to do all of the work?  So that's what this is. It's time for me to step up my freaking game.

Here I am at 30 years old with three kids, a college degree, and 11 years of "married" status hanging on my belt.  I'm not writing this blog to show how perfect my marriage is.  I'm writing this blog because my marriage ISN'T perfect.  We fight about silly things and not-so-silly things like money, sex, and maybe a little rock and roll.  We have discrepancies about discipline concerning the little munchkins.  What I am trying to say is that we do really awesome most of the time, but it is not always gumdrops and lollipops.  I'm not great at it, but I think it's really important to always shoot for an awesome companionship.  I'm hoping that my posts don't just speak to married couples, but to ANY long term relationship that needs a little dating face lift.

Us in a nutshell.

The first few years after the wedding day were a little rough. Who didn't have an adjustment period, right? If you say your first few years were a dream of fantastic-ness "I will slap you like a bad bad donkey, okay?" (Muppets from Space reference...)  We married very young.  We both were attending college full time and working full time.  My husband missed the chance of a college apartment experience, because he had the luxury of staying at home to save money.  Then he met me and was captivated because I was ridiculously good looking and freaking awesome (ahem).  So he snagged me up early, sacrificing any party time in bachelor-land.  We were also basically the first of our friends to get married, thus our home became the new bachelor pad apartment.  Video games until 2 AM with buddies sounds like a win win situation for both of us, doesn't it?  I can't blame him.  I was crazy because my body didn't like any form of horomonal birth control, I became depressed because I didn't know how to adjust living with another human being, and my self-esteem went down the crap shoot because (I realize now) the main form of self worth I had before marriage was when guys were asking me out or complimenting me.  It was lame, I know, but I'm just being honest.  I didn't know how to be myself anymore or how to act in social situations.  I was basically a hot mess.  With intense schedules, longing for days that would never be, and little miss crazy pants, we were kind of a recipe for not-so-greatness.

We became roommates instead of companions.

Don't get me wrong.  We loved each other so much, and we knew we were in this thing for forever, we just didn't know how to show it to each other.  Over the years, we have grown up together by going through hardships and wonderful-ships and slowly learning the magical powers of open and honest communication. I can't say we have been through it all, but we have definitely been through quite a bit, and I finally feel like I have a little something to say.

So what the heck is this really about?

I am challenging myself to take my husband on a unique date once a month and then blog about my adventures.  Why?  Because I love him, and I want him to always know that he is the best guy for me.  Hopefully readers will be inspired to rekindle the fire in their own dating lives and step up their game as well.  So many marriages are falling apart and I'm not saying this will fix the problems, but maybe it might help a little? Happy dating!

~Heidi